雅思IELTS「agree or disagree」型作文的Band 6、7、8版本

Band 6

Nowadays many people discuss whether music should be compulsory in primary schools. Some people think it is useful and other people think it is not necessary. In my opinion, I agree with this idea because it help主詞動詞不一致：應為「helps」 children to concentrate, but only in the first years of school.

Firstly「Firstly」和「Secondly」是主體段落之間唯一的連接, playing an instrument is good for concentration. When a child learn主詞動詞不一致：應為「learns」 the recorder, he must watch the music all the time, and if he do a mistake動詞錯誤且主詞動詞不一致：應為「makes a mistake」 the other children hear it. So he learns to concentrate and this is very important for his study. It is also a good habit for the future, and he learns to be patient. Many children have a problem to concentrate in other lessons, so music can help them with this.

Secondly, music is good for cooperation. Also, music is fun for children and they like to do it with their friends. Children play together so they cooperate and this is a good thing for the society論點只被點出，沒有說明；沒有舉例說明一起演奏如何培養合作. I beleive拼字錯誤：應為「believe」 this is a big advantage of learning music at school.

However, I think music should not be compulsory for all years. When children are older, they can be forced to play and then they will not like music, and some children stop to go to the lesson. This is not good for them and it is a waste of time in the school.

In conclusion唯一標示結論段的訊號，之後卻重複前面的論點, music is good for children and it is important in school. I think schools should make it compulsory, so this is my opinion引言設定的低年級限制被丟掉，立場因此變得模糊. Music helps children to concentrate and to cooperate, and it is good for them. I hope that schools will think about this.

Band 7

Some people believe that primary schools should make learning a musical instrument compulsory because it helps children to concentrate in other lessons. I agree with this view to a large extent, but I think the requirement should apply only to the early years of primary school立場和限制寫在同一句話裡，讀者可以直接複述.

The main reason is that playing an instrument trains concentration. A child learning the recorder has to keep their attention on the music for the whole piece自然的詞語搭配，而且「piece」是形容音樂作品的正確用詞, because a mistake is heard by the whole class straight away例子背後的理由在同一句中說明. Pupils who have practised this for ten minutes at a time are better prepared to a reading lesson介系詞錯誤：應為「prepared for」, since it is the same skill used on different material. Over a term, this repeated effort becomes a habit.

Another reason簡單而合適的引導語，這個段落只談一個主題 is that music teaches children to cooperate. In a class band, each child’s part sounds incomplete alone, so they must listen to the others and adjust. Over time the group also depends on each child, which gives every one of them a reason to take the lessons seriously. This is a skill that written exercises seldom develop, and it means that even a shy child can feel part of a group by the end of term.

However, I do not think the rule should continue for the whole of school life. Older pupils who are forced to continue may start to dislike music, which would cancel the benefit of the earlier lessons關係子句指回整個論點，用法正確. A choice would let those who enjoy music continue, while others could try a different activity. In conclusion, I agree that music should be compulsory in the first years, after which children should be able to choose.

Band 8

The case for compulsory music in primary school rests on what an instrument actually trains. I largely agree that it should be compulsory, because the claim about concentration holds, but I would limit the requirement to the early years主張、理由和限制在一句話中全部回應, when habits of attention are still being formed.

The strongest argument is that an instrument demands a kind of attention that few other tasks ask of a seven-year-old針對特定年齡層，所以主張有分寸而且精確. A child learning the recorder cannot drift: a note played late is audible to everyone, so the lesson itself corrects a wandering mind. The effect is gradual, but it accumulates over a term. Pupils who have spent ten minutes holding a rhythm are better placed to sit through a reading lesson, since the skill is the same one applied to different material理由直接放在句子裡，所以不需要額外的連接詞.

A second benefit is that music teaches children to work with others. In a class ensemble, each child’s part is incomplete alone, so playing well means listening to the rest and adjusting. The dependence is mutual: the group cannot play without any one of its members, and each child learns that early. This is a lesson in cooperation that a worksheet cannot deliver「This」指向一件明確的事，也就是剛描述的合奏經驗, and it explains why even a reluctant child often values the group performance at the end of term.

The requirement should not continue indefinitely, however引言預告的限制得到了論述，而不只是宣告. An older pupil forced to continue an instrument may come to resent it, which would undo the very attitude the early lessons built精確又自然，沒有炫耀的字. Those who enjoy music will continue anyway; those who do not are better served by other activities that build the same habits. Compulsory music in the first years, followed by a choice of their own, therefore seems a defensible arrangement名詞片語中插入分詞片語，標點使用乾淨.